things differently

just a few days ago I was going thru old pictures at my multiply account. And it made me miss those days. I want to be able to do all those again. The spontaneous drives, hard core shopping, lavish dinning.

I know I can still do that now, it’ll be just diffrent. I have to plan everything ahead, research about the place if its safe for baby, whether these restaurants has baby changing tables, stoller access, do these malls have the family washrooms. Not to mention pack a luggage (it was just a hand-carry before).

I’ve survived the chicago trip last year and had a great time. But this summer will be diffrent! We’re flying to seattle and vancouver! I’ve not travelled by plane for about 10 years now. And I am a terrible plane passenger–air sick! But I’ve survived a couple of flights with a help of Bonamine (but like I said, that was ages ago). And I tend to sleep althroughout the trip so I wouldn’t even think of being air sick! But this summer, I can’t do that. I have a baby that needs me. I have to think about his ear pops! The constant crying and our safety! Thinking about it now gives me an anxiety attack! I know I can do it! And it’ll be easier this time *hopes so*. Well, I’ve got 7 more months to plan this trip! I am excited yet terrified!

Wish me luck!

soooooo pissed!

Its my first time missing my baby’s doctor’s appointment. And its all because of *****!

I swear, I’ll never ask him anymore! I just don’t know when he’s joking or not!

Panginis talaga! Sa sobrang galit ko sa kanya di ako kumain on time! As in ganon ako kagalit! I go all day without a single rice! Halos mangiyak-ngiyak ako sa galit and disappointment dahil ni minsan hindi ako nag missed out ng kahit anong appointment ng anak ko! Hay! But am thankful that John is there for his appointment. But I don’t know how it wenr kasi nasa work pa ako.

He suppose to have his mmr. I don’t know how that went. I can’t even think how that whole shot scene went knowing John is petrified with needles (sorry babe, I had to let the world know…am being emo). *sigh*

dreading…

so its official! i just got off the phone with my manager. *sigh* i will be definitely working in downtown. that’s a good thing in a way… i am so much closer to my son. it’ll be just a half an hour away from home (in toronto). its a pretty busy site (compare to my now former workplace). but i guess, its a good thing *shrug*. i hate getting bored. i need to get myself busy instead of me constantly checking my watch whether if its time to go home then. 😀 i do that a lot! believe it or not, as soon as i walk in i’d ask my supervisor if its five’o clock yet. hehehe! and that goes on every hour. that happened a lot too when i was still pregnant. ahaha!

*sigh* i’ll miss my co-workers! i’ll miss the stinky dungeon (though it will still be a dungeon in plaza). i’ll miss our everyday sound trippings! turning the volume up with all the jazz (my playlist) and ballads songs! i guess, i’ll be just sending them 20,000 emails everyday about my rants and whines! hehehehe!

i have one thing to think about… should i start at 8:00am so i’d get 1 hours lunch, or 8:30am and get 30 minute lunch????? either way, i’ll still get off at 5:00 😀

also… am worried that i might be over dressed! coz people there aren’t fashionista as me. they wear what they wear going to bed. *rolls eyes*

busy momma

no, am not sick anymore. i have been soooo busy and its hard to steal a couple of hours from athan when he’s asleep to do something (like blog, LOL!). but today is a good day. daddy john is home (for 4 days!) so i can finally get going with my blogging and etc. LOL! well, they’re both asleep so i have my ME TIME.

its been almost a month since my last post and it was very busy and hectic. i was busy planning judie’s surprise baby shower (which was a hit!) everyone came (her friends). i was a bit worried few days before it that they might cancel on me 😦 but it went great. loooooots of food and there was about 50 people who came! wooohooo! i loooove throwing parties!

now, that’s done! i have to resurface planning for athan’s 1st birthday party. i have spread sheets with all the infos on it. by the looks of it… i think i’ve gone waaaaaaaay out! LOL! hey! he only turn 1 once! and its his first. “some” say to just have it at mcdonald’s eeeeeeew! so unhealthy and uber dirty playplace. gross! i’ve got other kids to worry about too! but i am the one incharge, i am the mom so i am the boss! :p i am in the middle of bookings and talking to suppliers. i hope i pull this off! i have 2 more months to go! not to mention am going back to work next month! waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah! and no babysitters yet! any takers???? *sigh* at this point i am stressed!

the word “work” makes me stress even more. *sigh* but there is a brighter side to it. i requested for a transfer in downtown. so i’ll be a lot closer to athan and i don’t have to deal with the nasty rush hour! now, it’ll take me about 30 minutes tops! i’ll just leave my car at the subway station and take one subway ride! sweeeet! but there’s a down part too! i get more work!!! which we all hate! hopefully i’ll get by again. it has been awhile since i last saw photoshop, illustrator, quark and indesign. maybe, i need to be reminded.

anyway, away from all those… i am excited for wednesday! it’ll be my first day out! hahahaha! its a test per se for john. we’ll see how he will last with athan. its something am scared to do but athan has to get used to being with daddy and not just mommy all the time. aside from that, i have to train him with a babysitter (yet to find).

i hear someone, gotta go!

sick mommy

I have been searching on the internet of my sudden fever (can’t find any). I was doing fine on wednesday all throughout the day (I even get to do lots of laundry loads) til baby athan and I woke up from our nap together. I felt the chills and body aches! Right then and there I knew that I was coming down with a fever. Its weird because I don’t even have colds or cough. Then I figured it must be fatigue, stress and overworked. Finally, at 6am of thursday I was shivering I think the bed shook. Lol! I woke up john just let him know I basically need help. Poor man, had to deal with my sick ass and baby athan at the same time. I could’ve picked up baby but I can’t even lift up my arm. So john woke up judie and vincent to watch over baby athan while he fix me a cup of neo-citran and gave me a sponge bath or cold water with alcohol. I felt so miserable and sorry for myself. I was so worried who would watch athan while am on my lows. Then john told me that he’ll pick up his sister to watch baby. He left right before I could say something. As much as I want him to be at home and take care of baby I understand that he can’t miss work yet. So althroughout the day I worked on sweating out and bed rest so nothing will happen to athan i.e. if he’s being fed correctly (which I think wasn’t successful, I think she forgot to put hot water!!!), get a full hour or two of naps (never happened), and constant diaper change (this I didn’t track down). Unfortunately, baby didn’t get his daily bath, since am the only one who gives him baths. And I do not dare trust anyone with his bathing! Seriously! Maybe when he’s a little older and he can maneuver himself out of the tub.

Anyhow, after a day and a half of bed rest, I am back! But I still have to watch it for a week that it could come back. Some say that I was bugged (again). So hopefully by later I can go on with my chores and can finally play with my baby. I miss him so much. I was crying last night to my sleep as I heard athan crying looking for me 😦 it made me feel more helpless. As much as I wanna run to him and rock him to sleep beside me I have to make myself 200% better for him.

On another note, I wanna rant how one can be easily offended when they can be so offensive themselves! I hate it!!! Take a good look at yourself before you say a word!